In flight
Thursday 1st sept. My mate john picked us up at 0630 to take us to the airport LDN HRW. Apart from being a friend he is a taxi driver. Always gives us a hug when we set of on these trips. It confuses the passengers of other taxis who wonder why they don’t get a hug. To be honest some of the drivers looked sa bit surprised , I think they thought it was to get a better tip. He never ever does , he doesn’t get a tip come to that , oh come on where friends it would be embarrassing.
I had already checked in online and printed my boarding pass. Even that isn’t enough at heathrow I had to print my own baggage labels. My boarding pass wouldn’t scan. In the end one of the assistants did it all for me including reprinting my boarding pass.
The A380 is huge. We the had the penultimate seats at the back. When we arrived the window seat was covered in pillows and blankets. My heart gave a little leap. Seemed to indicate it wasn’t taken. Then I noticed cushions on all the seats so I thought it was taken. But as the plane filled nobody came to claim it. I began to hope , every time someone looked like taking it I glared at them . I had begun to consider it our seat and anyone taking it would have earned my hatred. As it turned out it was free and we all know what a blessing that is. We did seem to have more space on the plane and the extra seat gave us room to lounge , spread our stuff and generally make the flight that bit easier.
There was an Irishman an Englishman and a chinaman in the adjacent seats. The Irishman age 25 said I am red haired , drink anything and cant go out in the sun how much more stereo typical can I get. The Englishman , looked like the hawk nosed Arab who is general cast as a villain to creep knife poised up on the hero to be summarily despatches him. The young Chinese lad it turned out didn’t drink. How do I know this? I had 5 hours of conversation to learn it all.
The Irishman removed cholesterol from eggs and was he claimed a scientist . O’i know oi’m a drunken bum on the plane but don’t deceive yourself oi’m really a scientist. The English Arab turned out to be an Indian who was a catholic married to an Irish women and he claimed by default to be a Finnian. He drunk a litre bottle of whiskey over the next 5 hours and then passed out fortunately for the rest of the flight. I thought he had died actually ‘cos at one point I turned around and there was this figure covered by a blanket looking like a death eater out of Harry Potter. I thought the cabin staff had covered him over to protect the rest of us. He (when awake) kept extolling the Irish lad to drink more claiming he was a disgrace to the Finians . He the arab/indian/Englishman from Liverpool claimed to be an accident investigator who had tried to buy a business in Ireland but couldn’t because his Irish wife was a lawyer only able to practise in England and Wales . At one point , well several actually he kept saying in a mock Irish accent and how old do ye tink o’i am ? o’im 60 , oi know , amazing isn’t it ya w’dnt fink so ta look at me boyo, w’d ya. The answer is no . e looked 70 and like the leering Arab generally found in 50’s films about the foreign legion or the British Raj up the Nile
Fortunately having failed to get the Irishmen or the Chinese lad to join him in getting bladdered (he actually pleaded with them at one stage) he succumbed to the drink and remained unconscious until the crew woke him when we were preparing for landing.
Before the happy event of him becoming comatose we had 3 hours of bullshit on everything from pasteurising fresh orange juice to the fact he spoke 7 languages and a general denunciation of the English as drunken louts whose beer and spirits are of low alcohol content because they cannot drink anything stronger unlike us Finnian’s....
Thursday 1st sept. My mate john picked us up at 0630 to take us to the airport LDN HRW. Apart from being a friend he is a taxi driver. Always gives us a hug when we set of on these trips. It confuses the passengers of other taxis who wonder why they don’t get a hug. To be honest some of the drivers looked sa bit surprised , I think they thought it was to get a better tip. He never ever does , he doesn’t get a tip come to that , oh come on where friends it would be embarrassing.
I had already checked in online and printed my boarding pass. Even that isn’t enough at heathrow I had to print my own baggage labels. My boarding pass wouldn’t scan. In the end one of the assistants did it all for me including reprinting my boarding pass.
The A380 is huge. We the had the penultimate seats at the back. When we arrived the window seat was covered in pillows and blankets. My heart gave a little leap. Seemed to indicate it wasn’t taken. Then I noticed cushions on all the seats so I thought it was taken. But as the plane filled nobody came to claim it. I began to hope , every time someone looked like taking it I glared at them . I had begun to consider it our seat and anyone taking it would have earned my hatred. As it turned out it was free and we all know what a blessing that is. We did seem to have more space on the plane and the extra seat gave us room to lounge , spread our stuff and generally make the flight that bit easier.
There was an Irishman an Englishman and a chinaman in the adjacent seats. The Irishman age 25 said I am red haired , drink anything and cant go out in the sun how much more stereo typical can I get. The Englishman , looked like the hawk nosed Arab who is general cast as a villain to creep knife poised up on the hero to be summarily despatches him. The young Chinese lad it turned out didn’t drink. How do I know this? I had 5 hours of conversation to learn it all.
The Irishman removed cholesterol from eggs and was he claimed a scientist . O’i know oi’m a drunken bum on the plane but don’t deceive yourself oi’m really a scientist. The English Arab turned out to be an Indian who was a catholic married to an Irish women and he claimed by default to be a Finnian. He drunk a litre bottle of whiskey over the next 5 hours and then passed out fortunately for the rest of the flight. I thought he had died actually ‘cos at one point I turned around and there was this figure covered by a blanket looking like a death eater out of Harry Potter. I thought the cabin staff had covered him over to protect the rest of us. He (when awake) kept extolling the Irish lad to drink more claiming he was a disgrace to the Finians . He the arab/indian/Englishman from Liverpool claimed to be an accident investigator who had tried to buy a business in Ireland but couldn’t because his Irish wife was a lawyer only able to practise in England and Wales . At one point , well several actually he kept saying in a mock Irish accent and how old do ye tink o’i am ? o’im 60 , oi know , amazing isn’t it ya w’dnt fink so ta look at me boyo, w’d ya. The answer is no . e looked 70 and like the leering Arab generally found in 50’s films about the foreign legion or the British Raj up the Nile
Fortunately having failed to get the Irishmen or the Chinese lad to join him in getting bladdered (he actually pleaded with them at one stage) he succumbed to the drink and remained unconscious until the crew woke him when we were preparing for landing.
Before the happy event of him becoming comatose we had 3 hours of bullshit on everything from pasteurising fresh orange juice to the fact he spoke 7 languages and a general denunciation of the English as drunken louts whose beer and spirits are of low alcohol content because they cannot drink anything stronger unlike us Finnian’s....
For 3 hrs we had the worst turbulence I have ever
encountered . The plane was bouncing about , the seats were rocking and the
thing was up and down. I cant decide if we were better off because it was big or it was impacted more because it was so
big. At times like this I look to see if the crew look worried but couldn’t see
any. Surprisingly the landing was so gentle I didn’t know we had landed .
Top Travel tip when you are likely to need goods a chattels
replenished Singapore air carry complimentary toothbrushes and disposable
razors.
They also provide free drinks including a tequila sunrise on
demand. To freely sometimes as the Irish
lad ordered a southern comfort and lemonade x2 , a red wine, and a white wine.
He knocked the red wine over and when he said to the stewardess (yes I know) O’i
appear to have made a mess she gave him another red wine.
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